Better at Making Appointments

I was attempting to make an appointment the other day to catch up with my children.  I live in the country and they live in the city – so whenever I am down it is nice to catch up for a coffee or meal.

Yes, I know it sounds weird saying ‘make an appointment’ to catch up with your kids, but nowadays it appears that everyone is so busy appointments are the only way to actually see anyone….Unknown-5

Except there is a catch to making appointments.  Most are cancelled, rescheduled (to be cancelled again) or everyone is late or has to leave early.

When I make an appointment I stick to it.  When ‘other people’ want me to reschedule as they are considered ‘more important’ I say no – but, I do say when are you free and I will book it in.  When it is BOOKED IN it is BOOKED IN.

I went to a function not long ago and there appeared to not be as many people as I thought were coming.  I spoke to the organiser (let’s just pretend that was me) and found that 10 people had sick kids (a fucking plague!), 7 had family emergencies (disaster everywhere), 5 got called into work (always at the call of the Boss “I hate it but you know….”), and the best of all…. about 20 just didn’t turn up…. – all this occurred on the day of a function where we had 6 months notice!!!!

I must admit I don’t get it?  Is it harder to say no than come up with an excuse on the day and actually lie.  How about “I don’t want to…” “Not my thing” etc etc.

The_Good_Doctor_2017Pretend your Dr Saun Murphy in ‘The Good Doctor” and tell the truth!!!!

It seems the only people that make appointments now are Doctors (who are running minutes if not hours behind) and a few other professions who mostly cancel at the last minute as something more important has come up.

When I say above ‘something’ more important it usually isn’t.  People seem to be running from something important to something more important most of the day (and night).  I wonder what happens when after constantly rescheduling your day, cancelling appointments, running around to get organised, that you finally sit there and say I have rescheduled and cancelled everybody and I am finally sitting here by myself.

People can’t sit by themselves….  there is always a meeting.

(Just a little anecdote about meetings and schedules – the building supervisor of the empire State Building used to schedule 3 minute meetings during the entire day as there was so much work to do…. your 3 minutes started when you walked through the door and included when you walked out….!!!!)

I make appointments and I keep them.  I have a ‘magic’ book called a diary.  I write my appointments in the spaces that are blank and when someone asks me what I am doing at a certain time I go to that space and read out what is written there or if it is blank, I say, I am doing nothing.  If someone wants to see me in a space where there is already an appointment I say ‘No’ and ask them for alternate times/dates – it works like magic.

Then on the time and date where I have something written in, I go to that place or greet that person coming to see me.

If someone says it is urgent they see me now – I say what would happen if I didn’t answer the phone, read the text or email…. (there is usually silence at this point…)… and I say when I am next free I will see you then…. it works like magic.

KubotaOften when people are REALLY REALLY REALLY busy and they can never appear to find time to catch up… I just group them all into one bunch and say I will be here at this time and place and you are welcome to come and say hello…. most start excuses before they even hear the time and date or place…  That’s okay because I will be there anyway, not waiting for them but just waiting.

And with all the running around to more important things, the rescheduling and cancelling for more important things, the non commitment to a date and time until the last minute, just because there may be more important things….  I say one thing…. that’s okay.

Yep, that’s okay.  I know where I will be and when I will be there and I hope you can come, if not as you are busy, that is okay.  But, if I book a time and a place I won’t cancel for ‘more important’ things to see you.

If you are ‘time poor’ that is okay too… because i have the same number of seconds in the day as you – we just choose to spend them differently.buddha-quote

When all the meetings are finished, all the rescheduling done, the appointments cancelled and rescheduled, the functioned missed because of sick kids and lost relatives…. when all the time to see people, and meet people, and catch up, and sit around, and just be with each other whether at work or play are over….  when the day is finished, when the long day of your life is finished – check your diary (if you have one) and you just can’t figure out where all the time went and why you never go around to catching up with the most important things in your life…..


(PS:  “Don’t quote the Buddha – be the Buddha” – I just love that one)

Better Retired (1 Year) – Happy Birthday Mum

Well where did that year go. Where did my ‘gap year’ go – did it start.

So a year ago I retired from the Police after 38 years – coincidentally it was on my Mum Gloria’s birthday.  She has been gone now for almost 3 years.

Nothing is permanent.c994218c9dd900cc2722235c2ed5bd5a--retirement-sayings-retirement-cards

We live our lives oblivious to the only one true inevitability – death.

On my final day in the Police there were a few things I wish I had done.  I wonder how big that list will be on my last day alive?

What if that day is today?
On my last day in the Police people asked me how I felt – I said relieved.  I felt the weight of responsibility lift from my shoulders.  Now this was a responsibility I had sworn to uphold (it was an oath I took pretty seriously) and I hoped on occasions I went beyond the call of duty.  Often it wasn’t a duty, it was really an honour.
On my last day on this planet (working on the fact that I will live to be 85 – I have 10423 days left) I wonder if I will think that I had spent my time well.  I wonder if each of those days I have left I will spend well.  As the poem goes, I wonder if I would have spent the Top-5-regrets-for-EL-Mag-VFdash between the date of my birth and the date of my death well.

In thinking, have I spent the last year, my first year of retirement, well.  Firstly, I suppose, I have to define well?  Is it doing what I want to make me happy; doing something that is meaningful; doing things for others – is it all of these things.  And if it is any of them, how do I measure it.

So, I am on the last day of the first year of my retirement – let’s pretend that it is not that day, but a day 10423 days into the future.

So, it is the future, 1st May 2046 and it is my last day and that day is today – I have a few hours left what should I do?  Lets go through the list of what I have been doing and decide what will make the final hours bucket list…..

  • Watching TV (especially Survivor!) – NO
  • Reading or Watching the News – NO  (I actually stopped doing that a few years ago…)
  • Shopping – NO  (what do I need in these final hours – what have I ever actually needed?)
  • Visiting Friends – Some are so far away (and I haven’t spoken to them for so long?)
  • Write Thank You and Sorry Letters – NO  (Wow that’s a long list, do I have time left?)
  • Visit the Kids – NO  (They are so busy – and I know you only miss your folks after they are gone…)
  • Arguing over bills, or money, or politics or religion – who would I argue with?  How would me winning any argument change my last day on earth?
  • Spend it with my Wife – I spend everyday with her, I tell her I love her every day, don’t I?
  • Spend it with Me – But, I know me don’t I (wouldn’t that be a waste of time?)


The clock is ticking and I don’t know what to do: there just isn’t enough time to finish everything and do all the important things.  I can’t even work out what the important things are!  I just keep thinking about all the things I have done (regrets and triumphs) and all the things I wont get to do.  I am sitting there as the minutes turn into hours and my final day on earth is disappearing and I haven’t achieved anything meaningful all day…..

Unfortunately all the ‘NOWS’ in my life have become yesterdays or unfulfilled dreams of the future.  What the fuck happened to everyone one of those 2,682,374,400 seconds – I just lived…. tick, tick, tick…. they just seemed to disappear in the noise of my life.

Now it is quiet and I have those final minutes, those final seconds…. what am I thinking….

But, as that clock tick’s those final seconds, each one is NOW: in each one I am alive and I get to truely experience it, the miracle of it, the absolute joy of that one moment….

As that last second ticks, I realise that I had 2,682,374,399 of them, that I may have
missed – glad I noticed that last one.

Back to the present – Lucky for me I actually have 900,547,200 left!IMG_4828

So, today, after 31,536,000 seconds of retirement: 89,683,200 seconds since Mum went to a better place; today on Mum’s Birthday, my ‘retirement day’ I am going to notice each one of those seconds.

I am going to be aware of me, of my life and that, in itself, is a miracle, a joy, and is in fact, right now!

Happy Retirement Day Ian – Happy Birthday Mum.  x


Better swimming against the undercurrent of discontent….

Something is not right.

As a matter of fact most of the people I meet feel the same as me, something is just not right.triangle

Most of us feel it most days.  We go to where we are going and see it along the way – we feel it in the people we meet – and mostly feel it, just under the skin.  Like an inch you can’t quite locate.  The pebble in your shoe that seems to move around – you take off your shoe, shake out your sock, put your shoe back on…. and a couple of steps later you feel the little niggle of it again.

What the fuck is it…..

It’s the constant undercurrent of discontent.

Something is just not right with my life.

I seem happy enough – but not quiet the happiest I could imagine.
I seem wealthy enough – but not quiet wealthy enough, to buy everything I want.
I seem to have enough friends – but not the friends that I want to be with all the time.
I seem safe enough – but so many things could go wrong.

I am swimming against the undercurrent of discontent… it is not sweeping me backwards, I seem to be able to hold my ground…. but I don’t seem to be getting to where I want to be.

So, I take a moment.  And realise that although I believe my discontent is now, it is actually in the future.  My discontent is about what I want in the future because I haven’t got it now.     So, I take that moment and stop looking at others, stop looking outside me, I actually stop swimming against the undercurrent and find, to my absolute amazement, I am not swept backwards one inch….

I am happy.
I am wealthy.
I have friends.
I am safe.

From what I wrote yesterday, I took that moment and just stood there.  I stopped living the discontent of where I am now because up until that moment I hadn’t been living there – I’d been living in the future.  The future where I will be happy, and wealthy and safe – really?

Surely, and thankfully, the future is a mystery….

I know I can’t know what the future will be, so why am I living there.  I know what the past was, and know I can’t change it.  The only time machine which can go into the future or the past is in my head.tardis2-1600x720

I have realised that my discontent, the discontent of the people that I see each day, the discontent of the world – is in fact the undercurrent of time travel that we are all living in.

The undercurrent is not water, it is not discontent, it is time – it is the time in our head.

The regrets of the past and the hopes of the future create a flow that ignores where we are right now.

Also in doing so I realise the under current of discontent has defined my happiness, my wealth, my friends and my safety – all are which are illusions of the past and future.

I’ve stopped swimming.  I am neither upstream or downstream – I am just here, now.

….. and the water is fine.

Better at just standing there…..

I was thinking of an old mentor of mine recently – as I do often, because the older I get the more his wisdom just makes sense and is spattered with old sayings from our childhoods that now we understand why our parents kept saying them…

He would often say when approaching an emergency situation:

“Don’t just do something, stand there.”dontjustdosomething2

Of course our first thought is this sentence is the wrong way around.

He would follow up with, stand there and take it all in, it may only be for a moment, a second, half a second, but during that moment let your grey matter do the work….

So you are standing there as calamity reigns… take this moment to ask yourself a few very important questions:

  1. Am I in any danger.
    If the answer is yes then the first thing is get our of that danger.
  2. It’s probably not as bad as it looks.
    If your not in danger, don’t panic and get yourself into danger.
  3. Who is in charge?
    If it appears nobody, then it may very well be you and you better get on with doing the job.

The interesting part of this great advice is firstly remembering it when the shit is hitting the fan; and secondly getting everybody else to stop running around causing more havoc….

My world has changed a bit over the last couple of years and the dangers I face are just not the same (I miss them a bit?).

However, the urge to run in full steam ahead still exists in most things I do.  Often this is easy as the majority of people are usually oblivious to what is happening and the others are filming it to put on YouTube.

As I come across these ‘dangerous’ circumstances in my life I hear and heed the words ‘don’t just do something stand there’ – they are often followed by ‘take a deep breath’ ‘count to 10’ all good advice from previous generations, all ignore by the next.

But lately, it is not so much danger as ‘problems’ I have to deal with – I suppose depending on how you look at it, there is not much difference, only perhaps the increased chances of death versus an undercooked steak being returned to the kitchen.  In making this leap – and it has been a leap –  in dealing with danger versus dealing with problems, I have begun to realise there are in fact no problems.  Yes, there is often danger, and in situations of danger the problem is dealing with fear.  However in day to day life we just love to describe what is happening as a problem.

I am giving that up.

Things are only problems in our head – the reality is that they are just situations that we have failed to accept and as such want to change them into a problem so that we can fix them to being what we consider normal – or as importantly, what we want it to be.

A few examples I have come across lately:

The problem with ‘cold callers.’  Immediately where hear that accented voice, or the conversation starts with ‘you have been randomly selected…’ etc etc.  We can feel our blood pressure rising and the annoyance at this ‘problem’ interrupting our very busy and important day.  Really?  You can just immediately hang up and get on with your day – about 2 seconds of ‘problem’ and it is stopped.  I personally chat with them as I am retired and I ask them more questions about themselves than their products “How are you today” “Where are you calling from” “Are you married” “What sort of car do you drive” – often they just hang up (problem solved) or occasionally I have an interesting conversation with someone who I was randomly selected to have a chat with.  I never buy anything.

The problem of people disagreeing with me.  This is a particular problem as I am almost aways right – but, often so are they.  So, I just let them disagree with me.  I often and easily agree with them and then just go on thinking what I want anyway.  Is there ever a real chance that someone who is addicted to an idea changing that idea because you disagree with them.  Most times by agreeing with them the conversation is over as mostly they just want to argue anyway and it doesn’t matter what it is about.

The problem of not having enough money to buy shit people on the telly tell me I need.  Forget this problem it just makes you hate your life now. If you buy what they tell you to, they will only bring out something next week that they tell you is better.  Unfortunately this is not really my problem, but an epidemic of thought in our modern world – which quite possibly is the biggest problem we have today – which is being dissatisfied.

This list could go on forever, as most of us, most of the time, consider most of our life, a problem.  The fact is that our life is not a problem, the people in it are not a problem, the things in it are not a problem, the things we do or don’t do are not a problem – even you are not the problem….

I am the problem.6360247751176320011373341910_Imtheproblem Flag wide

YES! I hear some of you saying – he finally has realised it.  And you are right. I have actually realised that I am the problem for even considering that things are problems – and often resisting them, fighting against them and/or, trying to fix them…… that IS the real problem.

Yeah, things don’t always go the way I expect – and that is okay.
Yeah, people don’t always act rationally or well – and that is okay

But, sometimes, most times actually, I don’t have to do anything, I just have to stand there.

I have to just stand there, sometimes physically, most times mentally and emotionally …… and accept it.

It’s funny to watch…. myself.  Hearing that little voice saying, oppose it, fight against it, fix it, yell at it, change it, even the arrogance of the voice saying, I can make it better……  and I don’t, I don’t listen to that little voice……   and, nothing actually happens.

The situation (the problem) actually remains the same – but amazingly when unopposed, un-argued, un-fourght, …….. often, it just fades away, or fixes itself.  It only actually ever needed me, for one reason, and that was to become a problem.

It was a situation – I just stood there – I accepted the situation – it still is a situation – nothing really changed except me.

Now, I can act, or not.2017-10 -13 -

But, in doing so, it is ME doing it – not my arrogance, my ego, my learned or instinctive reactions and behaviours, my emotions, not my need to win, not my need to be a hero or even a victim….

To you the difference may be imperceptible – but to me, it is everything – and nothing – it just is.


Better an Alien Invasion

I was chatting with a friend this morning and we were talking about an old 1938 radio play based on HG Wells “War of the Worlds”.  The play was structured like rolling news broadcasts of an alien invasion.  It created panic as people believed it was true (just toScreen Shot 2017-09-25 at 11.09.16 AM note, even during the news broadcast there were advertisements – which people apparently didn’t think was strange that they were being advised of a new dish washing liquid as the world was coming to an end?!).

We also started chatting about how most science fiction movies show that we are only invaded by completely incompetent aliens who we usually manage to defeat in a week or two!  Always remembering that these aliens have managed to travel across light years of space to invade us, in technology beyond our dreams, yet we manage to defeat them by putting a computer virus into their systems, with a X Box – usually by a 10 year old and his tear-away class mates.

It troubles me that we would consider any invasion by aliens to be by dumb aliens when we look around ou own planet.

I think any alien invasion would only go in a couple of ways:

  1. They would wipe us out from space and land after the dust settles and claim the planet now devoid of life.15afea01c456f2730ac033504404180c--aliens-music
  2. They would fly straight past (like we do when looking for a motel in a small country
    town on our holiday…) commenting – “We’re not staying in that shit hole!”
  3. If they were really benevolent aliens wanting us to join the intergalactic community, they would land, attempt to have a chat with us, and then fly off commenting “What a bunch of fuck heads!”

I can’t see our first contact going too many other ways.  We are basically belligerent children all arguing over toys we don’t need, but just want, so no-one else can have them.

I think it is strange that we, the human race, would think that any intergalactic alien race would want to be our friends…

What have we go to offer as a ‘new friend’.  I would imagine after a few weeks of being the new aliens friends they would be talking to there old galactic mates, behind our backs at the interstellar bar saying things like:

Screen Shot 2017-09-25 at 11.30.18 AMYeah I know, have you been to their house, it’s a shit hole.  They never clean up, there’s always shit everywhere and they just dump their rubbish out the back.


I can’t stand it.  They are always fighting, and it’s usually about sharing and who has the most toys.


Screen Shot 2017-09-25 at 11.30.18 AM

At parties they always take the biggest bit of cake, and it’s usually the fat ones who do it.


Have you had them over.  Mostly they arrive when they are not invited, they never bring anything except a bad attitude;  they start a fight, usually wreck the place and Screen Shot 2017-09-25 at 11.30.18 AMleave us to clean up.


Has anyone met their mate Someone, or They?  Apparently these two blokes are the cause of all their troubles and fuck everything up.

I think if I was an alien I wouldn’t want us as a mate.

If it was me, I’d drive on by or nuke the place from space.

PS:  I was thinking that was a pretty negative note to end on so I have reconsidered.  I hope when they arrive they conduct individual job interviews for entry into the galactic community – it would be interesting to see who gets a job and who is left behind?  Seeing Nibiru (the mystery planet) didn’t arrive on the 23rd, and the world didn’t end 5 years ago in 2012, I suppose we all have a little bit of time to build our individual resumes…






Better Defriended

I was having an on line discussion with someone over several days about same sex marriage….. (I’m voting yes – they have an ‘It’s okay to vote no’ banner on their profile picture) on the only true social commentary site of any validity…. Facebook!?
I made several comments. always respectful, always based on facts and often said I was interested and wanted to hear their arguments. I did not once swear, use offensive or abusive language.  Dare I say I was actually interested in what they had to say about why they were voting no as in one comment the said it wasn’t based on any religious grounds – I was a bit keen on hearing their argument.
Of course on Facebook where this was all taking place it is often hard to not have a few peripheral friends wade in to ‘assist’.  This was unfortunate when I received the following comment from a friend of the Facebook friend I was taking to…
Harry Connor Jr. Firstly, look up Agenda 21, a globalist agenda being forced upon all nations under the Globalist Banking Cartel under the Illuminati. Only three more nations left to control, Iran, North Korea, and Cuba. Then research gender laws in progressive states worldwide. Go deep in your research. Start reading alternative news sources rather than the Globalist controlled MSM, aka “Fake News”, which is strong on Psy Ops and Agi Pro. I won’t explain all of these things as it is best if you do your own research. Also be aware that the big tech companies now control 99% of the data, and are censoring search in support of this Agenda 21. The Illuminatti is Luciferian to it’s core! Do all of this, if you dare!  p.s. They are watching this thread (FB is a CIA front and a Globalist shill, (keywords and keyphrases), I can guarantee it!
I replied to the above input from Harry nicely “Okay, thanks Harry, I think you have answered all my questions” – and honestly I believe he did, mostly about Harry….
A strange interlude occurred during the above on line debate in that I met the person with the ‘vote no banner’ in real life shortly after – they had actually ‘complained’ that if I ever spoke to them in real life I may get to know them better.  A fair comment I thought.  I resolved to do that the next time I saw them in the vain of extending our Facebook friendship to the three dimensional world – maybe I would learn something.
So on the above occasion, when we did meet (in real life) I did…. I breached all electronic interconnectivity rules and said “Hello, how are you today”.   I received a curt reply “Is that sarcasm”…. I said “Um, no, it was just hello?”  They stopped talking to me and I did the same – I was starting to think I was in some sort of a no win trap here set by an social media evil genius.  I was feeling outgunned so did something unusual and kept quiet….
I didn’t post any more on line and was just happy to let it all go for peace sake.
I logged on this morning and was devastated – I had been ‘defriended’ (not by Harry above) but by my Facebook friend.  It did appear that I had overstepped the mark in real life by saying hello and as such had received the ultimate social slap in the face by being ‘DEFRIENDED ON FACEBOOK’ !!!!!!
Oh, the social shame and horror.  There is a silver lining in that I suspect this action may be seen by those who do it as a result of failing to justify their arguments, opinions and ideas as a justification for those same arguments, opinions and ideas – irony and hypocrisy in one neat little package – but, who am I to judge.  It is a sad social media truism that in this particular debate on same sex marriage it again has come down to using the ultimate social media ‘debate winning’ tools of:
  • Judging and vilifying people who you don’t agree with….
  • Using what is supposed to be one of the ‘most offensive words’ for a female, by a female…. (albeit by using a clever and dare I say mildly amusing meme…)Screen Shot 2017-09-04 at 8.39.47 AM
  • Defriending on Facebook….
  • But my favourite part of this entire process is the many likes, thumbs ups and supporting comments for the abuse and offensive language by those who up until that point had no input in the debate (other than Harry who did not stoop to abuse in the debate but at least presented his argument, albeit not something I would have correlated with this particular subject – I am going to contact him later, perhaps, about the ‘flat earth’ theory and those pesky fake Apollo moon missions….).
Social media is such a great place to share an opinion or a belief (or hopefully sometimes an idea)…. but, it must always be remembered that when you do this, what people may never have known about you, or perhaps may have only suspected, becomes obviously apparent by your post – and a lot of the time this may not be a good thing…..
‘Defriending’ people on social media is such an easy thing, just a click of the mouse.  Being ‘defriended’ can sometimes sting a little bit, but then again, it is perhaps more of a reflection of that person, who most probably was never a real life ‘friend’ in the first place.
In the past I have ‘defriended’ people.  In the two major occasions I have done this it has been in real life (I just had a thought in that I have never defriended anyone on Facebook – yeah I hide their news fed so I don’t have to listen to diatribe or self indulgence that brings a little bit of sick into my mouth – but I have never defriended anyone.  I suspect because in doing so you perhaps give the situation more attention that what it’s worth, even though it is just one small mouse click away.)
I have had to tell someone they were not only not adding any value or joy to my life but I was troubled in that I believed they were making my life much worse and on one occasion even dangerous.  I did it nicely and wished them well.  I even say hello whenever the planets align and we are in the same space together – even have a chat and hope they are doing well.
Defriending and friending are perhaps a greater indication of us than them.  Perhaps in the future I will spend a little more time cultivating my friendships – where ever they may be situated – instead of filling my time with the non-friends I do not yet have.

Better Father’s Day

Let’s firstly start off believing that Father’s Day is not a complete commercial fabrication bye170826a7abede21d22cdd4c6934c9a1 the Media (there Merchants of Misery) and that it is a true and genuine recognition of all the wonderful Fathers out there….  okay, now with that done, what really is Father’s Day about.

Is it really just a day where Dad gets breakfast in bed and a new pair of socks – or better still a handmade pottery mug (it used to be an ashtray!) and a handmade card from the kids.  Probably.

But, what about this Father’s Day, being a day for Dad to do something different.

Hey Dad, take this time to say one thing “I am a Dad, wow, how lucky am I.”

As a Dad, through some miracle of nature I got to be immortal – my DNA will go on forever  and there will be people who will remember me for at least a generation or two.  How lucky I am to have the privilege of being a Dad.

On Father’s Day everyone does a lot of thanking Dad, but on this Father’s day I just want to say thanks to my kids.  I want to say thank you for the privilege of being a Dad.

Some days (not only on Father’s Day) I wake up and think to myself I still can’t believe I’m a Dad – and all my kids are in their 20’s.  I sometimes, for no reason, get that little pang in my chest when I think of them for no reason (they are usually 100’s of km’s away at the time) – it is a flash thought about something they said or did, maybe years ago, or maybe last week, but it flashes into your mind and heart in an instant, and there is not feeling like it.  And, we let it pass and get on with our day.

When that feeling comes again, stop!  It doesn’t matter what you re doing, take that moment to have that real experience of being a Dad – that place in your heart that is filled with nothing else except the love for your children.  It’s a magic moment that we take for granted, but comes from nothing else other than being a Dad.

For me Father’s Day is really all about being a Dad.  Not by receiving thanks and presents from my kids, but my being the most grateful man in the world that I have the privilege of gratitudebeing a Dad…. I really still can’t believe it?

My kids are now out in the world making their way.  And I am glad of it for them.  It is their time now and they are out doing what every generation have done before them – the only difference is that it is my kids now.

I don’t mind when they don’t ring, I don’t mind when they still think home is a hotel and food is free and anything in the fridge is fair game.  I don’t mind when they forget appointments, anniversaries, birthdays or can’t make it to family dinner – I genuinely don’t mind one little bit….  I miss them, but I don’t mind.

Sometimes when I just sit and listen to their stories about their lives and I offer no sage Fatherly advice, I just listen – that is the moment that matters.

Sometimes when I am cleaning out old draws and I find an old picture they drew in primary school (I think it is a cat, or maybe a cow – it could be a house) – that is the moment that matters.

Sometimes when I look at old pictures, when they were small and hugging me like I was the only person in the world – that is the moment that matters.

An all these moments fade into the distance because when they do remember, when they somehow get lost and stumble back home, when they ring because they need you or just want to tell you a story…. in the instance that the phone rings or I hear the knock on the door and it is them – that is the moment I cherish the most, that is the moment that matters.

Fathers Day to me is a day for me.  It is a day were I take all of those moments, good and bad, and realise I am lucky, my kids are a miracle, and being a Dad is the best present my children have ever given me – and I wrapped it myself.

Happy Father’s Day.