Tag Archives: #thematrix

Better at Surviving the Apocalypse

Posted on by
Reply

All the news is bad and I watch too many Zombie apocalypse movies… but, over the last few years a truck just ran through a crowd in France killing people (I was going to say including women and children but aren’t all lives valued the same – probably not?), a car in Melbourne did the same… and man with a knife etc etc etc…..   (Just a little fun fact about a few people dying from terrorists and a few crazies…. anyone remember the 2004 Boxing Day Tsunami which killed over 240,000 people in 14 countries…..  can’t stop that one with a taser and a trolly!) 

I don’t think there is a great likelihood of there being a Zombie apocalypse or evil virus designed to wipe out the human race – but, I am sure there is some sort of war going on against us – and I mean all of us.  Plus, danger appears to be everywhere.

I am angry that the world is becoming (or is it just appearing to be…) such an unsafe and dangerous place, for us all to live in.  I write posts, I espouse threats, theories and rhetoric in the pub every chance I get, I like Facebook post that are angry,  and I get angry at the News (even though I have vowed to stop watching the it!)

But…. the big ‘but’ here is that I can do something about it; the other ‘but’ is I must decide what it is I am going to do – I have to have a plan.  So:

  1. I can decide to make a real difference, which would entail me dedicating my life to righting all these wrongs and really doing something about it.  I can join a lobby, protest and/or militant group to fight back.  I can run for politics and stand up.  I must be dedicated and fight with all I have, I mean everything – all else in my life must become secondary – to not do this just makes me another keyboard or pub warrior not making a difference but just making a noise….or
  2. I can do what I can and try and live my life the best I can.  What is doing what I can.  First of all it is stop talking and start doing, start paying attention to all the things I see in the world that make me crazy and start realising that it doesn’t all really mean anything until it happens to me, in my life, at my doorstep, to my family, to my friends (only close friends mind you!) – and, most of all be prepared (just like a Boy Scout).
  3. I can do nothing.

Interlude:  I got a little excited being a dooms dayer and realise I actually don’t really think this way all that much anymore…. this is one of my ‘draft posts‘ that I started after the truck ran through the crowd in France.  I was angry that anyone would do this…. and I was angry that this truck travelled over a kilometre and was crashing into cars, buildings, posts (and people) and still, people at the 900 metre mark were run over by SURPRISE (!) when the truck came up behind them.  I was angry at them for dying.  I was angry for them dying so badly.  Yeah, the first few hundred metres you can expect that people were  unexpecting….  but hundreds of metres later, with crashing and screaming and dying….  people were still oblivious to a truck smashing down a pedestrian walkway towards them – even if it was from behind….  I actually wonder how many died looking at their phones trying to start their video app so they could capture whatever was happening….   I think they just died badly… and worse…. oblivious and without really putting up a fight!

Interlude II :  I do feel sorry for all the people who have died in these terrible violent incidents we seem to be plagued with in our modern world…. but, just to put all that into perspective we ARE – read the following as a fact; you can research it and find I am right even if the media (the Merchants of Misery) don’t want you to think it….  we ARE living in the SAFEST, MOST PROSPEROUS, HEALTHIEST, period in human history – not just recent times, or centuries, but EVER! (CLICK HERE for a good article about the statistics involved).  So why are we all so afraid and convinced the world in on the brink of apocalypse….?

So where was I before the interlude(s)…..

I was going to attempt to survive the apocalypse, although it is unlikely it will happen, I still would not like to die oblivious and wearing my life jacket when the ship sinks.

Some years ago two of our children were involved in serious ‘survival’ situations that they were lucky to get out of, relatively unscathed…..  I thought, I am the doomsday prepper from way back, yet could not help my children when they needed me the most.  Why?  Because I wasn’t there and I had always planned on talking to them about ‘survival situations’ tomorrow….  well that day came, and guess what?  It caught us all by surprise!

So the next Christmas I gave the all the kids ‘survival packs’ for their cars…  Yes, I know it sounds crazy and paranoid, but they all carry them in their cars – and they love them, and they show their friends.

The packs have first aid, a few space blankets, some tools etc etc – the content is not really as important as the message.  …. and as a matter of fact the packs do contain a message in the form of the “Survival Manifesto”.  This is a short document which is the most important survival ‘tool’ in the pack.  It is a really simple message of staying alive when things go wrong by following the “Four Rules of Survival’:



I have noticed that when I ask people what is the first rule of survival, nobody gets it.

We often think of all those wonderful tips and tricks on the TV about survival, like building a fire, finding shelter, finding water etc etc – most of which most of us can’t really do in real life, in the real bush, in a real survival situation.

The one thing we never think about is not getting in that situation in the first place.

Now of course, this doesn’t help in surviving the apocalypse – because I am sure when it comes, the apocalypse that is, it will be beyond our control…. but most things in our day to day lives, even in those little moments which change the course of our lives, often, all we have to do is take a moment and think…. is this really a good idea?

Both situations involving my children could have been avoided, or at the very least minimised, if the first and perhaps the second rule of survival had been followed….

Also, survival as you can see is not about being able to build a hut from your boot laces and a mars bar wrapper – it is more about what is going on inside your head.

I know one thing.  The giving of the ‘eye rolling’ gift of the survival packs to my children and the highlighting of the above four rules make my kids, and me, and perhaps even you now that you have read this, more likely to survive ‘that situation’ (or perhaps even avoid it) than the vast majority of the world, who not only die, but unfortunately die badly and dumb.

I might write a few more articles about surviving the apocalypse from the ‘manifesto’ – but then again when times get tough, food is scarce and the shit has hit the fan, perhaps if there were less of us it would be easier…..

PS:  Statistically…..  if it is ‘every man for themselves’ usually 90 to 100% of people die – yet when everyone works together 90 to 100% survive….. can anyone guess what we humans do in 90% of survival situations……?  (I didn’t make this up and if you are interested a great book to read about historical survival situations is: “No Mercy – True Stories of Disaster, Survival and Brutality” by Eleanor Learmonth and Jenny Tabakoff)

 

 

Better at “Wishing You Were Dead”

Posted on by
Reply

I actually have a pre-occupation with death – because it is the one inevitability, yet we fill our lives worrying about shit – and buying shit….

I actually wish you were all dead.

Yes, really dead…. and then by some miracle you got to come back.

Would it be at this point that you realised that prior to your death, your temporary death, that just because you lived as if you were immortal, you were not and death was real – the end – no more…. well, would you then do things differently.  Fuck I would.

Firstly, I would delete every arsehole from my life – for some of you that may be me!  Secondly, I would sell everything I owned that I worked ‘all my life’ to get, as there is no point – no trailers on a hearse!  Thirdly, I would spend every minute with the ones I love, telling them that I love them – if they wouldn’t stop to talk, or catch up for a coffee or have a drink – as they were too busy, I would write them a letter, send them a card; something they could hold and feel.  Fourthly, I would go and look at stuff that was interesting, beautiful, spiritual… and travel, chat with people about their lives, share a meal, fuck I’d buy it for them, I sold all my worthless shit, I am rich for a while!  Plus, I’d send post cards back to all the people I love – post cards were good, now we just post shit on ShitBook and get likes from people that don’t like that we are travelling and they are working to buy shit for when they die.

Then if that took a day, a year or the rest of my life, which it would – then on that last day, when I spend that last dollar of my allocated time – I could say it wasn’t a waste, it was worthwhile, it was meaningful – and everyone would have good post cards to remember me by.

So, how come I write this … and I reassure you I haven’t been dead and come back to life … well, why write this?

I think it is because only a very few of us actually do…. not die and come back, but do what we really want – what is good in life… the reason is that the rest of us don’t really think we are going to die, until we do.  Then of course it is too late.

The funny part about this is when it is someone else who dies, we are also a bit surprised, sometimes.  And we think how much we miss them, and all the things we should have said, or apologised for, or all the times we almost caught up and cancelled for an urgent and unexpected work emergency…  then we just go on living and are glad we are still alive and live tomorrow just like yesterday.   Fuck we are all gutless.

If you are really into ‘self help’ you probably recently read ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck’ – I have spoken to a few people who have and they all seem to have forgotten a major point of the book is not about not giving a fuck but about giving a fuck about the right things.  A great example of this is Henry Bukowski; in the book he is put up as a hero / anti-hero and as you can see from his tombstone, he really didn’t give a fuck – which is not really what the book is about.

The point?

Old Henry really did what he wanted to – if you want a moment in the surreal, read a few of Henry’s poems or stories – he was one fucked up dude who didn’t give a fuck, and was proud of it.

I’m not saying I want to be Henry, but shit I admire him (much like most of the Australian population admire Ned Kelly and he was a thieving, horse stealing cop murderer who deserved to hang!) – but although Henry was a drunken prick at least he was funny right to the end.  (I have included one of my favourite poems at the of this post….).

Henry, thought about death a lot and realised his life was a big pile of shit, so treated it with the contempt that it, and he deserved…..  most of our lives are not like that – and there are a whole lot of people in the world who are much, much worse off than most of us – and even if you are one of them, you appear happier than most of us.

I know it will be a surprise when I die, because I wont think it will be that day; fuck it wasn’t even in my diary.  I used to have a mate who used to say (in jest, as he is still here annoying me…)  “My life is shit…. I’m going to kill myself… Oh fuck, I just don’t have the time….!”   Maybe, we all don’t have the time to actually live. let alone die.

So, that is my depressing (for you maybe, but, I am quite proud of myself…) post for today.

So, why?

Well, because today I saw a man who was looking the grim reaper in the eye, and he was shit scared – bet he never woke up this morning expecting that…..

           Death of an idiot – by Henry Bukowski

he spoke to mice and sparrows
and his hair was white at the age of 16.
his father beat him every day and his mother
lit candles in the church.
his grandmother came while the boy slept
and prayed for the devil to let loose his hold upon
him
while his mother listened and cried over the
bible.

 

he didn’t seem to notice young girls
he didn’t seem to notice the games boys played
there wasn’t much he seemed to notice
he just didn’t seem interested.

he had a very large, ugly mouth and the teeth
stuck out
and his eyes were small and lusterless.
his shoulders were slumped and his back was bent
like an old man’s.

 

he lived in our neighborhood.
we talked about him when we got bored and then
went on to more interesting things.
he seldom left his house. we would have liked to
torture him
but his father
who was a huge and terrible man
tortured him for
us.

 

one day the boy died. at 17 he was still a
boy. a death in a small neighborhood is noted with
alacrity, and then forgotten 3 or 4 days
later.

but the death of this boy seemed to stay with us
all. we kept talking about it
in our boy-men’s voices
at 6 p.m. just before dark
just before dinner.

and whenever I drive through that neighborhood now
decades later

I still think of his death
while having forgotten all the other deaths
and everything else that happened
then.

 

Better at Being a Politically Active Vegan

Posted on by
Reply

If you eat meat and don’t vote for (insert who you vote for here ____________ ) then you are wrong…..

Today I was having two discussions on Facebook about veganism and politics – both of which I care little about… however, the supplying of information, unsolicited, from both camps of course encouraged me to be adversarial, research both topics (in the opposite of course) and bait both ‘information’ providers….  why?

Because as always stated politics and religion (and diet) should not be discussed in polite coffee shop and/or dinner party conversation, as this adage I have paraphrased and bastardised sort of goes.  And why is this so.  Because, for me, I don’t care what you think or eat, just don’t preach it to me.

I rambled of a few quotes this morning which I ‘cherry picked’ from a very calculating series of Google searches, all of which started with “the opposite argument to….” – of course I got 1000’s of hits – as well as a very convincing video of the flat earth theory by the ‘Flat Earth Society’ (it looked pretty creditable actually…..?)

It is also very interesting in these sort of debates …. say that with an accent and it can be pronounced from my perspective as “da-baits” ….. because I can listen all day to the ramblings of a true believer (a skilled learned from being dragged to Church every Sunday morning during my childhood) as it gives me time to think about other things…. until their constant drone appears to be punctuated with one word that wears me down and signifies the true sport of antagonising the true believer is about to begin….  that word is “YOU”.

Okay what do I mean.

Simple.

I believe in God – versus – You should believe in God.

Okay, I can listen to your ramblings and have no problem with your beliefs – you can believe in the God Zot, from the planet Zing which requires that you put on a tin foil hat 3 times a day and pray facing the home world – but don’t try and sell it to me.  It is okay to tell me about it, to tell me about YOUR beliefs, so don’t wreck a good and amusing story, or the continued demonstrated perseverance of childhood conditioning, or peer pressure, or ideological blindness, that has helped you form your belief; but don’t, never, ever, ever, say “You should….”  for that sort of missionary position (sorry had to use that phrase) is the beginning of ‘da-bait’ and you cast it, so lets have some fun – well for me anyway.

All this is a bit cruel – for you and me – mainly me; as it doesn’t make me a better man….

I, yes I, will try and do better.  I will pray to ZOT for guidance.

PS:  Apologies there were no pictures on this post, but I wanted to have a post that didn’t have pictures to see how many would take the time to read to the end and then share this post with others……. hang on, I think I have seen this written somewhere before, I didn’t share it and didn’t receive any good luck (but, I am currently negotiating with a very nice man who through a Government accounting error has received millions of dollars to……but, that is another story for another post) –  I will pray to ZOT, who works in mysterious ways.

Better at Thinking Like Einstein: Quotes

Posted on by
Reply

So often in life when things are good or things are bad we are reminded of, or usually told by that wise arse friend some meaningful quote to either make us feel better, or often worse.  I personally love quotes as they mean two things to me:

  1. Smarter people than me have been in the same situation and survived.
  2. There are often few words which can explain complex feelings, people or situations.

I think point two is mostly lost in that the ‘quotes’ our parents said to us were corny and usually involved some life lesson that we weren’t ready for or mostly did not understand.

“count to ten when you are angry”
“a stitch in time saves nine”
“a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

Oh God, the wisdom of our parents can be found, in later life, just when you realise that you did completely the opposite and fucked things up.

But, the real reason I love quotes is that smarter people have been where I am heading, or just been, or plan to go.  Einstein has many quotes which have been my mantras for years – all duly disregarded until after the fact and I repeat them to myself and say “Einstein warned you of this…. and you did it again.”

One quote which has stuck with me for years is:

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.”

I have always loved this quote and espoused it to anyone who would listen, and even those who wouldn’t – why I continued to repeat my mistakes over and over again….  Which in itself indicates to me I am not as smart as I thought I was. (I love the Einstein quote when he was asked what it was like to be the smartest man in the world and he said “I don’t know ask Nicola Tesla.” – even really smart people know there are people smarter than them!)

But, what prompted this little rant this morning is the quote:

“Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.”

I suppose somehow over the last couple of years this has become a realisation to me.  Things that really counted to me, couldn’t be counted – but, I was counting everything else to gauge my success, wealth and happiness.

I want to think more like Einstein – not in solving the secrets of the universe but in “Not trying to be become a man of success, but by trying to become a man of value – a better man” (bastardised Einstein quote!).

I do have a quotes section on my blog page – but can’t remember the last time I updated it – probably because profound quotes are not the way we think daily but only when giving a speech or when things turn to shit – and as said above it’s usually some smart arse just taking the piss.  Maybe quotes that truely guide our lives should become more of our lives – instead of tattoos of Chinese symbols for love and faith we should have quotes tattooed upon us to remind us, forever, that good choices are actually choices….

So I thought I should finish off with a list of  Einstein quotes, and hope that you find something in them for you – or at least throw one in your kids face next time they stuff up.

1. “The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.” 

2. “Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.”

3. “Truth is what stands the test of experience.” 

4. “The only source of knowledge is experience.” 

5. “Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking.” 

6. “There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.” 

7. “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” 

8. “Human beings must have action; and they will make it if they cannot find it.” 

9. “Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.” 

10. “Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.” 

11. “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” 

12. “I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right.” 

13. “Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.”

14. “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.” 

15. “The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.” 

16. “To raise new questions, new possibilities, to regard old problems from a new angle, requires creative imagination and marks real advance in science.”

17. “Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.”

18. “Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding.” 

19. Life is like riding a bicycle.  To keep your balance you must keep moving.”

20. “Small is the number of people who see with their eyes and think with their minds.” 

21. “There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.” 

22. “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. The mediocre mind is incapable of understanding the man who refuses to bow blindly to conventional prejudices and chooses instead to express his opinions courageously and honestly.” 

23. “The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion that stands at the cradle of true art and true science.” 

24. “The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.” 

25. “Information is not knowledge.” 

26. “It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.” 

27. “Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.”

28. “Without deep reflection one knows from daily life that one exists for other people.”

29. “Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.”

30. “All that is valuable in human society depends upon the opportunity for development accorded the individual.”

31. “No amount of experimentation can ever prove me right; a single experiment can prove me wrong.” 

32. “If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” 

33. “You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I’ve only ever had one.” 

34. “The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination.” 

35. “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” 

36. “I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious.”

37. “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”

38. “The only way to escape the corruptible effect of praise is to go on working.” 

39. “The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind.” 

40. “Pure mathematics is, in its way, the poetry of logical ideas.” 

41. “Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing.”

42. “A man should look for what is, and not for what he thinks should be.” 

43. “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’n not sure about the universe.”

44. “Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions.” 

45. “In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep.” 

46. “The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.” 

47. “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” 

48. “I never think of the future. It comes soon enough.” 

49. “The value of a man should be seen in what he gives and not in what he is able to receive.” 

50. “Most teachers waste their time by asking questions that are intended to discover what a pupil does not know, whereas the true art of questioning is to discover what the pupil does know or is capable of knowing.” 

51. “As a human being, one has been endowed with just enough intelligence to be able to see clearly how utterly inadequate that intelligence is when confronted with what exists.”

52. “Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them.” 

53. “I very rarely think in words at all. A thought comes, and I may try to express it in words afterwards.” 

54. “Memory is deceptive because it is colored by today’s events.” 

55. “Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters.”

 

 

 

 

 

(I put this last quote picture at the bottom because only older people have the inclination or the perception of time well spent to learn something new the old way – through perseverance ….. )

Better on the Crazy Train

Posted on by
Reply

I have written a lot about living our lives on autopilot – just going through life watching TV, jumping from shiny thing to shiny thing and then, bang, one day you wake up dead and think how did that happen, I had so much to do!

I think there is another trap in life, especially modern life and that is riding the crazy train with all the other clowns and not knowing it.

There are two major challenges here – firstly getting on the crazy train and then getting off.

The crazy train is also a very different place.  All the people on the crazy train don’t know they are crazy and don’t even know they are dressed as clowns and recruiting other commuters.

We all have to ride the crazy train.  It involves listening to the Merchants of Misery (The Media) and believing them; working at jobs that don’t mean anything or make anything (commonly known as bullshit jobs), doing anything that involves any government agency or Bank, etc etc

But, the crazy train is a means of transport and doesn’t have to be a way of life.

Here is my little example.  You have to get on the crazy train to undertake one of the above  bits of life in modern society.  You press the button and step onto the train with a clear intention of your destination – by the way you don’t have to buy a ticket on the crazy train, it free!

You look around and see that everyone on the train is dressed as a clown.  They are squirting each other in the face with plastic flowers, throwing buckets of confetti over each other, driving up and down the isles in those little cars and generally doing what clowns do – this is the purpose of the crazy train – pointless motion in costume to achieve little results.

You find a seat by the window thinking of your destination.

Suddenly a very nice clown sits next to you and asks why you aren’t dressed properly and points out that you stand out as being different.  You politely tell them you just want to ride the train to your appointment.  His is very understanding and agrees that it’s okay for you to do that…… but, …… suggests that just so that you fit in a little better you might want to just try on, you don’t have to wear it all the way, but just try on, this red nose.

What could be the harm you think – you do feel a little awkward and the nose might help.  After putting on the nose you are introduced to a few other clowns.  Each one suggests something else you might want to wear to fit in a bit more…. what could be the harm you think.

So as your destination is approaching, you are in full clown outfit and juggling at the end of of the carriage when your stop is announced.  You say you have to get off, but you have fitted in so well, it seems a shame to leave now.

Some insist you stay as you are the best juggler they have ever had…..

What, me, juggler clown…?  You yell out “No, I am not like you.” and as you do you catch your reflection in the window of the carriage, in full clown outfit, juggling and smiling through your clown makeup……

You stay on the crazy train.  You can’t remember your original destination but you are now going with everybody else and it seems like the right thing to do.

Suddenly the door opens and a person gets on with street clothes one.  You sit next to them and suggest they try on the spare red nose you have so that they will fit in a bit more.

Better at Not Knowing Who I Am….

Posted on by
2

The other day I heard this great explanation of figuring out who you are;  it starts off as a little bit of a test and the interesting use of the word percieve.

This is a bit of a follow on from a post I wrote the other day about possibly being in a computer simulation (which I suspect may still actually be true!) – the thing about this post was in part, identifying who I actually was.

The dictionary meaning being “become aware or conscious of (something); come to realize or understand”

So here is the exercise about finding who you are…. I will use a car (an ordinary automobile, like the one you drive to work):

  • I am looking at a car (or even driving it, or touching it)
  • I can perceive that car.
  • Am I the car?
  • No.  I am not the car because I can perceive it.
  • I can not be something I can perceive.

You can repeat this exercise around the entire house with all the things you own.  You can even do it with your friends ….. “Am I my best friend, no, because I can perceive my best friend, so I can not be them….”

Now comes the really tricky part of this little exercise.  Stop worrying about all the ‘things’ and people around you and just take a seat and think about you.  Now we are going to repeat the exercise.

  • Am I my body? No.
    Because I can perceive my body.
  • Am I my thoughts?
    No.
    Because I can perceive my thoughts.
  • Am I my emotions?
    No.
    Because I can perceive my emotions.

What the…..!!!!!

What am I.
Who am I.
Who is this all perceiving me.

Good question?

Better the Construct of Myself (Is this The Matrix?)

Posted on by
Reply

The start of this post may not make sense to people who have not seen (or understood!) the movie The Matrix – but a lot of people will say the movie can not be understood…. anyway I digress.

To summarise the premise of the movie:

Our lives as we perceive them are computer generated and we are all actually living in a simulation…

That about sums up the Matrix and the rest of the movie and subsequent sequels are about our hero, Neo, trying to get control of the simulation and escape to the ‘real world’.  (The real world in the movie is actually a bit shit and we all live as human batteries in a pod of jelly – but again I digress….)

Part of our hero Neo’s education of him being a ‘slave to the machines’ who run the simulation (The Matrix) is that he goes back into the Matrix to defeat it.  In going back into The Matrix he finds has a certain look, wears certain clothes, has a certain haircut etc etc – all of which turn out to be his ‘construct’ of himself in his mind which is translated into his appearance in The Matrix…..

NB: Apologies but I think my introduction above to this post is as about as complicated as the movie!!!!!

So, our hero Nero lives in the Matrix as a ‘construct’ of what his mind tells him he is…..

Is this sounding a little familiar now?

I think we all live in this world (which the longer I observe could actually be The Matrix and the movie was really a documentary…!!!) as constructs of ourselves.

For me the ‘taking of the blue pill or the red pill’ (for those who haven’t seen the movie the choosing of the pill is the time that our hero decides if he wants to know the truth!) was when I retired from my career after 38 years…..  suddenly I was no longer the ‘construct’ I had made of myself over those years.  For me this was a bit scary as I actually thought this was who I was.

For all of us I think this construct is different, but it is often just the way we think about ourselves as opposed to the way we act.  I was trying to think of a few generic example…

We think we are generous but dont donate to the man in the street…

We think we are good at maths but can’t balance our finances…

We think we are no confrontational yet always appear to be in arguments…

We think the bloke down the street is an idiot yet he appears to be happy and we are always miserable…

I think the problem with our ‘construct’ is that it only relates to the real world in our head, and worse it is only visible as a shit construct to those around us and not ourselves.

One thing that led Neo to discover The Matrix was that everyday he had lived his life, it just, didn’t feel right.

In my pervious career it never just felt right.  The values that I was living, didn’t quite feel right, my interactions with people, mostly didn’t quite feel right (the funny part about this is the best interactions I had with people which I remember vividly today were the ones where upon reflection I didn’t behave in line with my construct)…. mostly, in the last 38 years I feel as if I have been living in The Matrix, walking around in a constructed personality, clothes, attitudes, loves and hates, friends and enemies, values and even dreams and aspirations, which were created outside of me.

A lot of what has happened to me in the past, a lot of what I did and said, was like watching a movie.

So, I wake up – I take the pill that shows me The Matrix is not real and my construct… my construct of me, of who I think I am, who other people think I am…. is in actual fact, basically, bullshit!

Well, let me tell you that realisation is where the fun starts, as perhaps you are left with nothing.  I was lucky.  Still lurking inside me somewhere was me.

I am still trying to find him… and let me tell you 38 years of learned, acted and executed behaviours is something pretty hard to unlearn.

Living now is really living the adage that if it doesn’t ‘feel’ right, even if that feeling can’t be put into a logical train of thought, then it probably isn’t.  I catch myself at least a thousand times a day thinking as the ‘construct’ who is telling me that the person I am trying to find is actually imaginary and get back to the real world and the business at hand…

But, I think there is a trick.

What if the new me is just another construct and I find that I am watching the wrong movie, and it is all just a dream within a dream and Leonardo DiCaprio just appeared from Inception….