A few months ago I was with a couple of my good old mates attempting to go for a ‘3 hour cruise’ on one of their little sailing boats.  Well the result was similar to the fate of the S.S. Minnow when we became stranded motorless in the Patawalonga moorings drifting towards the bridge.  One of us had decided to take a rope and swim back to the mooring so we could them pull ourselves to safety (it wasn’t me!).

At this time, with stresses high, it was not a good time for the well meaning bogan to look over the side of the bridge and ask if we were having trouble…..

I suppose, no matter how much I attempt to control ‘the scorpion’ (see my post Better the Scorpion) it is at moments like this that control is abandoned for the only form of defence, attack!   Also, as sarcasm in the lowest form of wit and apparently the only kind I possess, I replied to our friend and his bull terrier on the bridge:

‘No, we’re right, we’re doing this for fun’

Well what proceeded was an increasing heated exchange where our ‘saviour’ substantially withdrew his offer of assistance to help and exchanged it for a more sincere offer to smash my face in!

Luckily it took us so long to get the boat moored that he lost interest, but, I did then receive the assessment from my friends that I was capable of ‘picking a fight in an empty room.’

Yeah…..  must to my denial, they were perhaps pretty right about that.

I try to see the world from the funny side and stick to my mantras (see my Home Page) but often things (and especially people) no matter how hard I try, shit me!  That term, ‘shits me’ has also become a mantra towards me by a certain group of friends who have heard me say it so many times – often they will start the chant “Hey, does that shit you” “Yeah, it shits him” “That’s gotta shit ya”

Through all the above  – ‘picking a fight in an empty room’ and ‘that shits me’ –  I have come to realise it is just me, being reflected back at me.  It is like those moments when you walk past the mirror after a big night out (or when you are old!) and initially step back in shock as you don’t recognise yourself immediately – the bad, or is it the good part is that upon that recognition you realise it is time to get your shit together and tidy yourself up and face the day with your best face.  I think this is the same with attitudes not only your appearance.

Bob (see Better with Bob) used to say the only way to live each day is with an ‘attitude of gratitude’.  Great little saying, although I am not one for ‘cheesy’ little proverbs delivered usually with a condescending all knowing grin and at a time when it just to ‘shits me’ and I want to argue with them…… oh, there I go again!

I think the observation of me ‘picking a fight in an empty’ room was probably more insightful than the obvious intent – which was to take the piss out of me.  However, upon reflection the two mates I was with, one was (see Better with Des Steele – my friend) and one is still (see Quotes Page – The Wisdom of Puk), pretty insightful sorts of guys.

I suppose the mirror reflects us as our friends reflect the person we really are.

I also think a lot of these ‘fights in empty rooms’ are fights inside my head – always remembering that inside my head is a very dangerous place and I never go there alone!

Maybe, the bogan on the bridge was a reflection of me – maybe it is all done with mirrors and the actual trick is seeing, and realising, what is real, what is now, and what is important.

Maybe, next time I am picking that fight, I perhaps need to spend more time on the riverbank (see Better on the Riverbank), realising that maybe, the enemy I am waiting to come floating buy, the person I am wanting to fight, really is in that empty room – because it’s me.

I hope, I win.